It feels like Im living without air this few days .
Saying the truth , this is the first time I met a friend that I love the most .
And I just spoiled it .
This few days , we quarreled . Just because the paper thingy .
I never thought this will happen . I mean , actually there's something happened and maybe I've really did wrong .
Now , this happened . Both of us don't speak to each other . Not mad , Im just don't know how to say .
2 days , I didn't talk to her 2 days . Its like something missing in my life .
Talking , laughing , sharing problems and secretes with her had became my lifestyle , and it suddenly stopped . You know the feelings ?
I never listens to song or singing song and the tears suddenly falls down . It happened twice this day , when Im singing a song , a friends song . I was thinking , isit changing my school is the best way to settle this problem ? If I change my school , then she'll not seeing me again . Is that a good idea ? Cause Im the one who brought this problems out , and she's taking them all down ? nehh , Im the one who should . So , changing school should be the best way .
I was wondering .. Who should I sit with every Monday ? I used to sit with her , talking with her even the discipline teacher and prefects looking at us fiercely , pray that Simon wont catch the untied students . Now , with who should I do this things ? With the other friends ? Oh no , sorry . I dont think I can do that .
We got a deal that we'll sing together on the stage before . But now , we'll sing with other groups in our class .
I asked her for the singing competition . She said , its unfair to participate in many groups . And the answer tells me , she don't want to .
Yesterday while taking pictures during classes , there's a flash go through my mind . Me and Jing used to take pictures during classes . We seated together at the back , and since teacher change our seats , we never take pictures together during classes already . I uploaded pictures to Facebook just now , and I realized that , I didn't take pictures with her .
I still remember , I've pranked her once . I told her Im changing school and she cried ! I never thought that it will happen . And then she scolds me STUPID , of making her cry .
I told her Im staying in the hospital wad , and she scolded me STUPID . just because dancing made me stay in the wad . haha :D
And , the day I cried , I told her my problems with my mum . She scolded me STUPID once more , because of mum , I cried with my face all tears .
On the day the High School Musical dancing competition , while practicing at UMS . I did hurt my knee , and that made me stay in the wad . I remembered , when I heard that crack sound , I fell down and laying on the floor . And she's the one who came 1st to me . She asked me not to move , and the other two members came . She's the first who came to me .
She's always be the first in my life .
She's the first I ever share my problems with .
She's the first I ever rely on .
She's the first I ever crying to tell about my feels .
She's the first I ever share my secrets with .
She's the first friend who scolds me STUPID when Im doing maths that she also don't know .
She's the first who came to me when I get hurt .
And she's the first friend whom I met that I love the most .
She said , She's not suitable to be my friend and she wants us to be classmate ONLY . That hurts me a lot as well . Really hurt me .
I don't know how to live as a CLASSMATE with her ..
" When your friends done something behind you , hold your tears and turn back to say I DONT NEED YOU ANYMORE "
I did wrote this , and I think she can use this now .
Well , I did talk a lot this time . Just hope we'll be just like the real us .
